Hello friends. I am post-op 6 days after my surgery that I had on Monday! I thought I would do a little update. I am doing well on the most part. Yesterday and today has been the hardest so far. The pain is mild and not really that bad thankfully.
I went outside for about 5 minutes today to see the outdoors, get a change of scenery, and hopefully brighten my mood. I will be honest today has been emotionally hard. There have been tears. Lots of tears today. I am not sure why, but I feel so DONE with this all and I know I have so much longer. I think the fact that I know how much longer I have and I truly do not have a choice is weighing on me. A lot of people keep saying embrace this time. I appreciate the sentiment but to be honest I feel I have embraced this season fairly well and truly I am ready to embrace something different. I will be obedient to the Lord's will for me and embrace this stillness. He is Sovereign and in control and knows the plans He has for me. But it is okay I have tears at times.
Isn't this lantana beautiful?! My granny always had lantana on her porch. When I see it, I always think of how much she loved it.
I love this pot with the mix of lantana and other flowers. It brings a smile to me every single time I see it.
Anyhoo... back to the recovery. My incisions so far are doing well. I do have some pain but in places I wasn't expecting. I will say my stomach so far (as of today) just feels bloated and a little crampy. Coughing has NOT been easy nor fun. I often forget and go to laugh and cough and it is very uncomfortable. I FINALLY got to wash my hair today! Showers are very exhausting. Who would think it would feel like you ran a marathon after a shower. Well, I can testify this is the case. Imagine me and my extremely long hair being washed and dried. NOT FUN! But I am glad it is washed and feels a lot fresher.
Back to the emotions....I think the fact that I know I will be down for a while and already have been down really has truly been getting to me. It is getting old. Very old. I have tried to be joyful in the midst of it all but today I just want to allow myself to be okay with the feelings that I am sad, tired of it and ready to be back to normal. I don't even know what normal feels like to be honest. From March until now my health has not been good and it has been a long journey. One that I have tried to handle with positivity and grace. Today, I just want to be okay with the tears. I want to be okay that I am frustrated and tired.
Wandering outside and taking some pictures of our small flowerbed and potted flowers was nice. Guess what..... I was crying while doing it. LOL! I was thankful for the peace, the beauty of flowers, and being able to even get outside. My situation could be worse. I was emotional and wanting to get back to normal.
This is the thing.... I wish all I had going on that was trying and difficult is recovering from surgery and a long stint of health issues. For personal reasons there are things I will not share on my blog. I will say, that while I have been dealing with this, I also have had some major personal things going on as well that has been life changing and difficult. We all have stories! Some we share and some we do not. Grace is always important.
Oh, this flower turned out so good. Seeing this reminded me how much I love taking pictures in nature. I miss my hikes and nature walks. I have so many beautiful images from my times on trails.
As you know if you are a regular visitor, I try to keep my blog positive as can be and share how I overcome life's hard moments finding little joys and embracing each season that comes my way. Today though for my own journaling and remembrance I want to share that this part of this surgery and recovery has been hard. You know what.... that's okay. It is okay that I am being raw and honest.
I am so thankful for all of you that have emailed me, commented and blessed me with a happy mail package. I am beyond grateful and treasure you all. I have been so blessed and reminded I am not alone. I will share some of the Love Packages I have received in a different post soon. JUST KNOW I AM BEYOND THANKFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am going to end this post and finish my movie I am watching. I watch a little of it and then I pause and do something else and then watch some more.
It is called Sheep Detectives. It is interestingly neat. :) I will let you know my final thoughts.
Tomorrow is a new day!
With Love,
Chrissy T
25 comments:
I am so sorry to hear you are struggling. It is hard enough to deal with everyday problems without the pain of surgery and recovery. I will keep you in my prayers. If you want me to pray more specific prayers, you can email. I'm a praying friend! Sweet hugs, Diane
Hello Diane! I will email you in a few days for sure! Thank you so much for your encouragement and prayers. Also, praying for you!
When we are going through 'things' and things it is not uncommon to feel down on occasion. Number one your body is going through a LOAD of stuff just now. Anesthesia, pain, prior pain and inability to function normally, this 'new' normal... It's a form of grief and perfectly normal, so allow yourself to feel the sadness. You don't have to dwell in it forever but do allow it to happen naturally. It's the best way to heal that portion.
Secondly, crying has a whole world of good benefits. It restores homeostasis and produces both endorphins (which boosts mood) and oxytocin (a natural chemical that helps reduce pain). So by all means, honey, cry.
Third, I'll be praying for your in your recovery period and for all things you must face in this season.
So sorry to her you are struggling with your recovery. I sure hope and pray things get better for you. I sure do love the flower pictures...especially the pot with the Lantana in it. Janice
First of all, you are entiled to all the feels. Life is hard... and then you add the emotions of being post-op. We all need a safe space to vent now and then.
If you still have my number, feel free to shoot me a text or call anytime. I'll be praying for you!
So sorry to read that you are feeling so down Chrissie but do allow yourself these feelings as you know they will pass. It can often be the anaesthetic that makes you weepy too. This is quite common. Take care Chrissie xx
Those flowers are beautiful!
Sending love and hugs. I am glad you are healing well even if it is a little uncomfortable. Some days you just have to have a good cry and you have every reason to be emotional.
I am planning on watching The Sheep Detectives later today. It looks good.
Hi Chrissy. You are entitled to feel whatever way you're feeling right now. I had a good cry this morning over some things I wish the Lord would explain (but won't) and it felt good to just be honest about being worn out sometimes. Life really throws some not so fun things our way, too often for my taste, and sometimes it just gets frustrating going through one thing after another. But we're only human. I hope your physical self heals quickly and hopefully that will help your mental health, as well. I pray that each day brings a little bit more joy your way. Take care.
So sorry your are having such a hard time. My dad used to say to me, this too shall pass.
I read a comment you made on another blog saying you like strawberry sandwiches and it made me smile. I love them too and I've eaten them all my life!! I've not come across many people who eat them. :).
Thank you so much for your encouragement and your prayers. :)
Thank you, Janice.
Thank so much friend.
After I read your comment and I looked it up and you are right. There is such a thing as post op blues from all of the stuff. Thanks for bringing that to my attention
It was good and cheesy. :) Thank you Kim. Hugs!
Thank you so much Debbie!
Thank you for the encouragement, Karen. Yes, I love them. You are right not many people eat them.
I'm so sorry to hear that you are feeling so down, Chrissy. I think it's helpful to let the tears flow and to share. Both actions are a release. You've been through so much and the surgery was a huge event, but all those weeks before of waiting and worrying, being thrown off your normal schedule of activities and restricted - on top of feeling physically poor - would surely take a toll on anyone. I hope this next week is a turning point and one that has you feeling lighter.
Oh I really could not embrace the downtime either and chafed at having to take it so easy... and really didn't take it anywhere near as easy as I should have. It drove me nuts to feel so weak and tired and know just how long it was going to take to heal. It sounded like forever away... and I was completely mobile and not on any restrictions BEFORE my surgery either. I think it's 100% normal and totally okay to NOT be okay with feeling so restricted. Your flower photos are beautiful.
Chrissy, thank you for being so open about your recovery.
It’s brave to share the hard days as well as the hopeful ones. Tears are part of healing, and it’s okay to let them come.
Your flowers are beautiful reminders of joy in the midst of struggle, and I love how the lantana connects you to your granny. Praying tomorrow feels a little lighter for you. 🌸
Thank you so much my sweet, treasured friend. I appreciate you much!
Thank you so much, Joanne. I honestly, keep going back and reading your posts on your experience. It helps me.
Thank you so much Veronica. I really appreciate you and your encouragement.
Beautiful flowers! 💕 Love you,Mom
My heart goes out to you. I understand
How you are feeling.
I got diagnosed with uterine cancer
I February it was quite a shock.
After sonograms,cat scans,X-rays and
Lots of doctors I went for surgery.
I was to be in the hospital 6 hours and then recover at home.
Nothing went as they planned.
I was in the hospital a month.
I ended up with blood and urine infections
plus sepsis. More surgery. Not to mention hospital bills over half a million dollars and still climbing.
To make a long story short it was a long
slow healing progress.
With a PICC line and IV antibiotics for seven weeks. Home health visits.
It was a very humbling experience.
Everything that could have gone wrong did.
Cut yourself some slack.
Take it all moment by moment.
It's too overwhelming to do it any other
way. I had days in the hospital I just cried.
Feeling I couldn't take anymore.
I thought I'd never go home again
It was a slow recovery.
It's almost July now I've lost a fair part of the year.
But I made it. You will too.
God brought me through it all.
When I broke and couldn't go another step he carried me . I mean that.
I was in horrible shape and couldn't have survived all of what I went through
without God.
He will bring you through
it all.
Your garden is beautiful.
I also love lantana. I have pink,soft yellow and purple. Planted around my roses and zinnias.
You are going through a lot right now, and have an overload. The saying is true sometimes....when it rains, it pours. I am thinking of you during this most difficult time, and just whispered a prayer for you. That purple flower is beautiful, and you know, that's my favorite color! I hope you get strength in the days ahead. You're right, finding joys in the little things seems to always help.
Post a Comment